Upcoming Trip to Ethiopia

I am full of emotions. Dave's trip to Ethiopia is coming up very soon which means he is leaving us. I am nervous. I am nervous for him and his group.  I am nervous about being home without him and not being able to just pick up the phone to call him.

I am also scared, anxious, jealous, envious, happy, and excited.

Dave gets to take a group of men, women, and youth to Ethiopia and make a difference in lives. How cool is that? Dave gets to visit Kolfe and see our sponsored son again. Dave gets to see Korah again as well as see some of the amazing individuals we have gotten to know from our last trip. Seriously how cool is that? I am so impressed and proud of Dave for bringing this opportunity to our church and getting others to back him. Thankfully Dave has some amazing people to help coordinate this trip as he certainly could not have done it alone.

But you see... I am left at home. I do get to be with my girls which believe me is wonderful. I don't leave my girls very often so leaving them would be extremely hard on me. I need my hugs and kisses each day! I just wish I could be in both places at one time.

I want to go to Kolfe and see the young men. I want to visit the most gracious people ever in Korah. I want to smell the Ethiopian air, eat the amazing food, and share my love of the country with the group from my church. I want to be there too.

I am also nervous to be home alone for so many days. I never sleep well when Dave is gone. And what if something goes wrong like we lose electricity or get a major snow storm??? Too many unknowns for me and it makes me nervous, scared, and anxious.

I know I'll be okay.  I know I'll take good care of the kids and I know that I have friends in town to help me if needed.  I know.  However, I still have my emotions and I am who I am.

Adoption

What is adoption? Isn't it bringing a child into your home where you will love, care, and nourish for the rest of his/her life? Well yes but adoption is so much more.

When we first talked about adoption, I wouldn't envision being able to parent and love a child like he/she was "my own". I wouldn't imagine not being pregnant and not giving birth to a child. I wouldn't imagine loving a child so much that it hurts. I wouldn't imagine any of it.

After our second failed IVF treatment, I knew I was done with the shots and I was done holding on to this dream of being pregnant. The roller coaster of infertility treatments was over and I couldn't wait to get off the ride. I no longer wanted to fight with my body and I didn't want to cry anymore. I knew then that I was more than ready to be a mother and that it didn't matter if the child was born to me or not. That is when we got serious about adoption and growing our family.

I remember many discussions with Dave about whether we should adopt internationally or domestically. I remember talking about which country we would adopt from if we chose the international route. I remember looking at all sorts of beautiful children from all over the world. I remember not thinking about the child's history or about the child at all except that he/she needed a loving home. It was all about me and what felt comfortable for us. Sounds awful but that is the reality. We were naive.

Dave had brought up Ethiopia several times. Never did I dismiss it but I wasn't sold right away. I guess I was unsure if we would be able to care for an African American child and give this child the tools he/she needs to survive in this world. We were fortunate to know a couple who had recently adopted two handsome young boys from Ethiopia. This couple sat with us and answered all of our questions. They helped me realize that my child was in Ethiopia and I could raise an African American child. Ethiopia it was and we immediately began the adoption process.

Along came Maya. Two years later, Makenna.

Three years later we are parents to two incredible little girls who were both born in Ethiopia. In three years we have fallen in love with another country, the people, and the culture. Three years later we are no longer naive but informed. We now know that every adoption has a story, every child has his/her story. I grieve almost daily for the loss both of my girls endured. They not only loss their birth parents but their country as well. It is hard for all of us. At the same time we know the opportunities that are now available to our girls including education, but what we want most for our girls is to know Ethiopia, the people, history and the culture. We want them to know their birth story - to know the sacrifices that were made in order for them to be part of our family. Many people tell us how lucky the girls are, but we (Dave and myself) are the lucky ones. We get to parent these two beautiful Ethiopian beauties.

Adoption is hard and we would do it all over again although this time with our eyes wide open.

We love you Maya. We love you Makenna. We love your birth families, we love your birth country, and we love you.

First Trip Out of Town

Have you ever gone on a trip that didn't turn out exactly the way you had envisioned it?   This weekend we took our first road trip as a family of 4 and Makenna's first car trip. We left Saturday am and drove 3+ hours to visit my brother and his family.  I had a plan before we left home.  The plan was this...we would meet my brother and his family in Sioux Falls, make a quick trip to Once Upon a Child, have lunch at a local Ethiopian restaurant, shop at the mall and then drive to my brother's which is 45 minutes north of the city.  Easy enough.

WRONG!  Although we did managed to complete everything, it wasn't without consequences.  The girls were tired and excited to see their cousins and us adults were ready to lose our patience as the girls did not listen and did not make good choices.  I guess I shouldn't have had expectations as it is normal for a 3 year old to be wild after sitting for 3+ hours.

We did make it to a local Ethiopian restaurant.  The food was delicious!!!  It was the first time for my brother and his family.  They gave it a shot and I think they actually liked some of it.  Maya was too busy being naughty to enjoy it  which was a disappointment.


 

After lunch we hit the very busy mall with 4 tired children.  You can imagine how well it went.  Why does it seem when you have awesome store coupons to all your favorite stores, the mall is absolutely crazy?  Apparently all these people had the very same coupons and had the very same idea.  Darn it.  Well we stayed longer than we should have and finally left.  I did managed to quickly stop in at a few places.  It wasn't the most pleasurable shopping experience. 

After we arrived at my brother's the girls could finally burn off some energy.  Maya and her cousin Olivia had a blast playing with each other.  Makenna decided it was time to be fussy while her cousin Rachel was a sweet and calm child.  They really have different personalities.
 

Sunday we had a nice morning and the girls enjoyed dying and decorating Easter eggs. 

 

We also tried taking a picture of all 4 kids.  The key word is "tried". 
 

After lunch, we packed the car and headed for home.  The first 45 minutes were fine as both girls fell asleep in the car.  After a quick stop at Target to feed Makenna, we started our 2+ hour trip home.  It wasn't the best as Makenna screamed for most of it and Maya got upset when her movie didn't play (darn DVD  players).  What seemed like forever, we finally made it home.
 
We actually did have a nice weekend and the girls enjoyed themselves.  I just have to remember to not have any expectations and not to expect my girls to cooperate after a long car ride.  I must first let them run off their built up energy before we attempt anything such as shopping.  I've learned my lesson.

Thanks Jon and Shannon for hosting us!

You NEED these necklaces!

Purchase of these necklaces goes towards Kolfe Boys Orphanage!

Jodi from JStudios created these awesome necklaces and the proceeds go towards helping all the boys at Kolfe. Who wouldn't want to help an orphan and have a beautiful unique piece of jewelry? I love mine and you will love yours too. I only have 4 left to sell so contact me if you are interested by leaving a comment or emailing me at ethiopiatofargo@gmail.com.

Means "Hope" and is $22 (with chain)

$22 (with chain)

Means "Faith" and is $22 (with chain)

a pendant only no chain, $10

JStudios has many other wonderful pieces of art including more jewelry so check her blog out as you won't be disappointed! Go here. And...if you don't feel you want to purchase a necklace, you can also help sponsor a pizza party for the boys. Check out Lindsey's blog for more details!

EKC Mehaber, Adoption Announcements, and More!

Will you be going to the annual EKC Mehaber on July 10th in St. Paul, MN? For more information about the event go here. It looks like it is going to be a great event this year and I'm excited. We have attended the past two years and have enjoyed it very much. It is a great way to meet up with friends, shop at the Merkato, watch some traditional Ethiopian dancing and of course eat some yummy traditional Ethiopian food.

One of the sponsors of the event is Salem, dear child. I have never heard of them until now. They have some amazing products for sale including some Ethiopian baby announcements! I just love this one.

They have t-shirts, announcements, life books, poems, and so much more. You can find all of the Ethiopia products here. As a side note, they do have many other products as well not just adoption. Pretty cool site.

Our Thoughts About Traveling to Ethiopia

We have been asked several questions by several people about being in Ethiopia. Of course we are no experts but we are happy to help anyway we can. Here are some questions we have been asked and our thoughts.

1. How much money to exchange?
   I guess that depends on what your agenda is for the week, how many days you are in country, and what the requirements are from your adoption agency or accommodations (hotel, guest home, etc.). We recommend you convert more than you need as it can be difficult to exchange money while you are there and the banks are not open on the weekends. To give you an idea, to hire a driver all day would be around 60 USD. An Ethiopian painting would be around 200 Birr , and an authentic Ethiopian soccer jersey is about 600 Birr. We converted enough money to pay for any shopping, dinners, and for our accommodations (which included any dinners at the guest house, drivers, and laundry service). Remember you can convert it back to USD at the airport if needed.
2. Where do we recommend for people to stay?
   We had the best experience at the Ethiopian Guest Home (EGH) and highly recommend it. You can click here to read all about it and how it got started. We have never stayed at any of the hotels but I hear the Hilton and Sheridan are very nice.
3. How did we get around the city?
   Thankfully the EGH has drivers. We just had to let the receptionist know what time we needed a driver and they arranged it for us.
4. Is it safe to eat out and were we worried about getting sick?
   Yes it is okay to eat out as long as you understand what is okay to eat. For example, I would never get an apple with its skin on as it very well could have been washed with tap water versus bottle water. As long as the food is cooked and isn't something that is cleaned with tap water or grows in the ground like lettuce, you should be fine. It is best to talk to your doctor before you leave and get a prescription for travelers diarrhea.
5. What kind of things did we do while in country?
   If you have read our blog posts recapping our trip (see our January 2010 blog posts), you have a good idea of all the things we did while in Ethiopia. The main reason for our trip was to bring home our daughter Makenna but we did do many things outside of the adoption (Kolfe Orphanage, Korah Leper Colony, shopping, etc.). If possible, we highly recommend getting out of the city and seeing the countryside as Ethiopia is absolutely beautiful. Some things to do while in Addis are visiting the National Museum, shopping, Lion's Zoo, and Traditional dinner/dancing.
6. What to pack?
   I made the mistake of packing way too much our first trip and thinking I could style my hair like I do at home. For our second trip, we packed light and had our laundry done while in Ethiopia (EGH has a laundry service). I kind of felt like it was camping but on a good day as you do have water, electricity, and the possibility of styling the hair (as long as you have the right converters). If you are bringing home a child then be sure to pack what you need but you can buy formula and diapers at any supermarket for a reasonable amount. Personally, I feel it is best to keep the infants on the same formula until you get home so I recommend purchasing it once you arrive in country.
7. Other tips and advice?
   If you are traveling with an infant, I highly recommend bringing a baby bjorn with you or something like it as it will save you while traveling though all the airports. For toddlers bring an umbrella stroller. I would also recommend bringing some snacks along with you especially something with protein (nuts, protein bars, etc.). You can certainly stop at a grocery store while in country but it may be easier to pack a few snacks with you. Last but not least - only drink bottle water!

I hope this helped those reading this post and waiting to travel to Ethiopia for your first time. We love to talk about Ethiopia and help answer any questions so feel free to ask away. Again, we are no experts but are happy to help. If anyone has anything to add, please do so!

Be a Valentine to an Orphan in Ethiopia

You can be a valentine for a very special orphan in Ethiopia by sponsoring them. There are 50 boys available for sponsorship at the Kolfe Boys Orphanage located in Addis Ababa, Ethiopia.

Your financial commitment of $34/month provides for the most basic needs of children in the community. HopeChest will assist in providing food, water, access to basic medical care, education and discipleship. While $34 cannot meet all the needs of a child suffering through extreme poverty, it does provide significant help.

Each sponsored child's network of emotional support is greatly expanded. Staff at the orphanage will receive special training that equips them to better deal with the unique emotional needs of the orphaned children they serve. Also, the sponsor’s involvement in each child’s life through cards and letters is an avenue of emotional support the child would normally be denied.

In our community-to-community model, all funds are "pooled" together so that if one child does not have a sponsor, they will still have these needs met. Your contribution of $34 a month will go towards providing food, clothing, and access to medical care, as well education and discipleship.

Here are 4 of our 52 children still needing a sponsor.

If you are interested in sponsorship of one of these boys (or any of the other waiting children which can be viewed by clicking on the banner below) than please email David at kolfesponsor@gmail.com

Children's HopeChest will also offer Life Skills training to these boys. Teaching them how to live independently as they age out of orphan care.

Read below for additional information on the sponsorship program provided through Children’s HopeChest.

Your partnership with Children’s HopeChest releases spiritual and financial resources to the children while individual orphan sponsorship brings the unique blessing of relationship.

HopeChest offers the needed expertise and resources to benefit orphaned children, as well as access to the orphanage. Not only does our staff in the US provide accountability and support, our indigenous staff on the ground, including disciplers, are responsible for the spiritual, emotional and physical aspects of sponsorship.

A HopeChest discipler or mentor is a national believer who visits the orphanage every week. Disciplers conduct classes on culture, character and Biblical principles. They spend time with the boys and help them with moral and ethical issues, problems and concerns.

Specific benefits to orphans include ministry in five areas:

Environmental - A portion of the sponsor’s support, combined with that of other sponsors, improves and maintains a healthy environment. This includes the purchase of clothing, shoes, furniture, books, etc. if needed.

Medical - Each sponsored child will receive regular health checkups, and medical intervention as needed. Improved nutrition is also provided.

Emotional - Each sponsored child's network of emotional support is greatly expanded. Staff at the orphanage will receive special training that equips them to better deal with the unique emotional needs of the orphaned children they serve. Also, the sponsor’s involvement in each child’s life through cards and letters is an avenue of emotional support the child would normally be denied. Regular visits from disciplers will also add to emotional well-being.

Educational – Sponsorship helps provide resources for the education of sponsored children. In Africa, for a child to attend school, fees must be paid, and uniforms and books must be purchased.

Spiritual – Orphaned children will see the love of God demonstrated tangibly through age-appropriate Bible teaching. A discipler will visit the orphanage regularly to conduct classes. Your prayer and letters will also encourage a child’s spiritual growth.

To read more about sponsorship through Children's HopeChest please click here.

Day 7 – Friday: Goodbye Coffee Ceremony

Friday we awoke early to the realization that we were heading home. While we were excited to see Maya, we were not ready to pack up and leave Ethiopia. It didn’t feel as if we were done, we had so much we wanted to accomplish, we had met so many new friends, we fell in love with a city, country and the people that live there.

Of course before we could say goodbye, Theresa had to leave many tears behind. She connected with Rediet in a way that only could be viewed as long-lost sisters. She is a special woman and we hope to stay connected with her for a very long time. Along with Rediet, Naod and Sosina were the guest home receptionists, hosts and nannies during our stay. They provided such a great setting for us during our adoption trip. Our experience would not have been the same without them.

The entire staff at EGH was amazing including the translators and drivers. In the below left photo are Sammy and Aki, our guides during the week. Gecho (below right) was our main driver during the week. A grandfather himself he was so sweet to all the children as well as the families.

Joining Rediet and Sosina to say goodbye were the receptionists from the other guest homes. Below right is our kitchen staff who provided us great food and amazing smoothies all week. We didn’t lose any weight this trip like our last one :)

But alas, it was time to go. The EGH held a goodbye ceremony for us and the Ulrich’s who were on our flight back to the States. All the staff came to visit, laugh and say goodbye.

A group shot of the three families that stayed in our guest home. One family is located so close to us, in fact they vacation every summer just minutes from our lake place – hopefully we will be able to stay connected. The other family is from the Faroe Islands, which are a part of Denmark. Such a neat couple experiencing the joy of parenthood for the first time. They provided such interesting stories and heritage that added a unique wrinkle and culture to our visit.

Good-bye Ethiopia.

Day 6 - Thursday Night (Dinner just the 3 of us)

After the embassy appointment we felt that we should celebrate and go to dinner as a new family. We decided to head to the Lime Tree cafe as we received recommendations both here at home, as well as while we were in Addis. We were told they had the best chocolate cake and oatmeal raison cookies in town. Of course we sampled both as well as some carrot cake – all were amazing.
Unfortunately Makenna wasn’t up for a night out and was very fussy so we adapted by one of us eating quickly while the other entertained her, then switched so we could both eat. We asked for to go boxes for our desserts and I downed my macchiato. It was a nice night, although we had hoped to spend a bit more time together exploring the Bole area around the cafe.

Day 6 - Thursday

Today is a big day for us as today is Makenna’s U.S. Embassy visit where she will obtain her visa that will allow her to return with us tomorrow to the states. We purposely didn’t plan anything for this day to ensure that we wouldn’t miss our transport to the embassy.

It was beautiful out so we decided to take a walk down to the drop-in center that is partially supported by the guest home were are staying in. This drop in center is run by Compassion Family International and Peter Abera. It it located about two blocks from the guest home. The center is a drop-in for children in the local Kebele (think borough) whose families cannot afford traditional schooling. At the drop-in they are provided education and food.

We were able to watch part of the learning from the day – so precious to see the little boy leading the class learning the Amharic alphabet.

Compassion Family International Drop-In Center from David Held on Vimeo.

The children also took special interest in Theresa’s hair – they all wanted to feel it and run their hands through it. It was really cute and a nice change from us running our hands through their beautiful black curls :)

HopeChest

Located in the same building as the drop-in center is the national headquarters for Children’s HopeChest, of which Peter is also the director. It was great to see where their offices were and have the opportunity to meet a discipler as well as the sponsorship coordinator.

Embassy

After an early lunch we were picked up and off to the embassy. No photos or video unfortunately as the embassy does not allow any of that. I must admit we were ready for a long afternoon as our embassy visit for Maya was well over two hours during our last trip. We were pleasantly suprised that from the moment we parked the car, two security checkpoints, the waiting room, the embassy interview and back out again took less than 30 minutes! Seriously, we were the very first family called after the lunch hour and it was such a blessing.

After the embassy we had some time so we decided to continue our hunt for children’s sized jersey's of the Ethiopian National soccer team. We tried two more stores and decided that after seven (7) attempts that it was time to give up – there are no jerseys for children :(

Day 5 Wednesday – Part Two

ALERT Hospital & Korah Community

Now that we have introduced Sammy, I figured the rest of the story would make more sense.

75 years ago the village was established because of leprosy. The people came from the countryside to seek treatment for their illness. They came to ALERT Hospital, which was established by Dr. Ross, from the U.S. and a Dutch doctor named Chris Dorman. When they heard of the spread of leprosy, these two men approached King Hale Selase to request land to establish a hospital specifically for the treatment of leprosy. King Hale Selase was willing to give land, but only land that was far from the town and in the forest so as to keep the people with leprosy separate from everyone else. The two doctors started the hospital and began treating these patients who had immigrated from the countryside.

These infected people came to the city because their family members believed they were cursed when they contracted leprosy. Some of these individuals were put into a separate hut when their disease was discovered and later their family tried to light their hut on fire. The family members were so convinced that the leprosy was a curse that they were willing to kill their own children. Some escaped from these hostile family members and came to Addis for treatment.

The history of Korah is hard for many to hear or read of because of the many injustices that the community has faced. Today, these injustices have resulted in a community that needs the understanding, guidance and help of the church. There is much potential for this community of “rejects” and that is why this website and the ministries described herein exists. To read more about the background of Korah as well as my source for above information.

We received a short tour of the hospital. Each patient receives six months of treatment and they come from all over Ethiopia. They receive medical treatment as well as physical therapy. After six months they are forced to leave and many have no place to go so they end up in the surrounding area, which is called Korah. This area includes the dump and there are over 75,000 people living here.

We then went into the community itself. Our guide, Sammy, grew up in Korah and is an amazing man. He and a number of others have created a ministry, Great Hope Church, within this community and they are accomplishing some great things.

Great Hope received a small source of funding that they are using to feed 65 children from Korah who are attending the school on the hospital property. For many of these children, this will be their only meal of the day. Imagine having the opportunity to go to school, but not have the energy and resources to learn. This opportunity is so important to these children.
While visiting, the children came to eat. We were able to help serve them food and interact. It is amazing to see such spirit and hope among children no matter where you go.

We then visited a group of homes in the community that are a representation of how many of the people of Korah live. Imagine one large home that is seperated into eight (8) small rooms, and a family each living in one of these rooms. There is no roof, you walk through one home (room) to get to another and the walls are made of mud. If you lean against a wall, it is likely to fall into the room next to you. There is one mattress on the floor where the adults and the youngest children sleep. As the children grow, or a new child comes along they are moved to the floor. During the rainy season they sleep with plastic covering them to keep them dry.

This man below was so nice, he graciously invited us into his home where his wife was making coffee. They were so sweet and were grateful for the opportunity to spend just a few minutes with us in their home.

As we left, the children were returning to school, stomachs full and enjoying being kids! :)

To view the photos we took of Korah as well as others that have been provided to us, view the entire album below.

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