Seriously - can you get any cuter?
It's been a LONG while
4 years ago
Sunday, April 25
Friday, April 23
Funny How Life Changes After Kids
Before bringing home Maya, I recall telling a co-worker that I don't plan on changing my life after I become a mother. Ha! I remember thinking that I still wanted to be "Theresa" and not just Maya's mother. I remember that I wanted to continue to be able to do the hobbies and activities that I love like exercising, movies, hanging out with friends, and being active.
Wow! I couldn't have been more unrealistic.
I think it is nearly impossible for your life not to change once you have children. Once Maya was home, my priorities changed and rightfully so. My life wasn't about me anymore but about this little person whose life is dependant on me. Instead of doing my own thing like going to the gym after work, I had to ensure Maya was being picked up from daycare. Instead of eating cereal or my favorite popcorn for dinner, I had to ensure Maya had the proper nutrition. Instead of plopping down on the couch to watch some television, I played with Maya, ensure she got a bath, and got her to bed on time. Now realize, I certainly did not do this alone as I am married to a wonderful husband and father. We both had to make sure Maya was well taken care of and that her needs were met each day.
And you know what? I love it, most days. But there are days that I crave to have personal time. Days I wish I could just do whatever I wanted like curling up with a blanket to watch some of my favorite shows or having dinner with friends. Days I wish I could have a date night with my husband without two little girls next to me.
The key is moderation. I now know that I am "me" as well as Maya's and Makenna's mommy. I can be both. It is important for the soul to take time for yourself and do things you love. I still exercise but I do it in the am versus after work. I still watch TV but after the kids are in bed. I even go out with my friends. Dave gets his time too as we work together to ensure we both get time to do things we love and enjoy. It may not be every day or week, but we do try.
Has your life changed after kids? Would you change it? I know I wouldn't as I love being a mother.
Wow! I couldn't have been more unrealistic.
I think it is nearly impossible for your life not to change once you have children. Once Maya was home, my priorities changed and rightfully so. My life wasn't about me anymore but about this little person whose life is dependant on me. Instead of doing my own thing like going to the gym after work, I had to ensure Maya was being picked up from daycare. Instead of eating cereal or my favorite popcorn for dinner, I had to ensure Maya had the proper nutrition. Instead of plopping down on the couch to watch some television, I played with Maya, ensure she got a bath, and got her to bed on time. Now realize, I certainly did not do this alone as I am married to a wonderful husband and father. We both had to make sure Maya was well taken care of and that her needs were met each day.
And you know what? I love it, most days. But there are days that I crave to have personal time. Days I wish I could just do whatever I wanted like curling up with a blanket to watch some of my favorite shows or having dinner with friends. Days I wish I could have a date night with my husband without two little girls next to me.
The key is moderation. I now know that I am "me" as well as Maya's and Makenna's mommy. I can be both. It is important for the soul to take time for yourself and do things you love. I still exercise but I do it in the am versus after work. I still watch TV but after the kids are in bed. I even go out with my friends. Dave gets his time too as we work together to ensure we both get time to do things we love and enjoy. It may not be every day or week, but we do try.
Has your life changed after kids? Would you change it? I know I wouldn't as I love being a mother.
Wednesday, April 21
Monday, April 19
Adoption
What is adoption? Isn't it bringing a child into your home where you will love, care, and nourish for the rest of his/her life? Well yes but adoption is so much more.
When we first talked about adoption, I wouldn't envision being able to parent and love a child like he/she was "my own". I wouldn't imagine not being pregnant and not giving birth to a child. I wouldn't imagine loving a child so much that it hurts. I wouldn't imagine any of it.
After our second failed IVF treatment, I knew I was done with the shots and I was done holding on to this dream of being pregnant. The roller coaster of infertility treatments was over and I couldn't wait to get off the ride. I no longer wanted to fight with my body and I didn't want to cry anymore. I knew then that I was more than ready to be a mother and that it didn't matter if the child was born to me or not. That is when we got serious about adoption and growing our family.
I remember many discussions with Dave about whether we should adopt internationally or domestically. I remember talking about which country we would adopt from if we chose the international route. I remember looking at all sorts of beautiful children from all over the world. I remember not thinking about the child's history or about the child at all except that he/she needed a loving home. It was all about me and what felt comfortable for us. Sounds awful but that is the reality. We were naive.
Dave had brought up Ethiopia several times. Never did I dismiss it but I wasn't sold right away. I guess I was unsure if we would be able to care for an African American child and give this child the tools he/she needs to survive in this world. We were fortunate to know a couple who had recently adopted two handsome young boys from Ethiopia. This couple sat with us and answered all of our questions. They helped me realize that my child was in Ethiopia and I could raise an African American child. Ethiopia it was and we immediately began the adoption process.
Along came Maya. Two years later, Makenna.
Three years later we are parents to two incredible little girls who were both born in Ethiopia. In three years we have fallen in love with another country, the people, and the culture. Three years later we are no longer naive but informed. We now know that every adoption has a story, every child has his/her story. I grieve almost daily for the loss both of my girls endured. They not only loss their birth parents but their country as well. It is hard for all of us. At the same time we know the opportunities that are now available to our girls including education, but what we want most for our girls is to know Ethiopia, the people, history and the culture. We want them to know their birth story - to know the sacrifices that were made in order for them to be part of our family. Many people tell us how lucky the girls are, but we (Dave and myself) are the lucky ones. We get to parent these two beautiful Ethiopian beauties.
When we first talked about adoption, I wouldn't envision being able to parent and love a child like he/she was "my own". I wouldn't imagine not being pregnant and not giving birth to a child. I wouldn't imagine loving a child so much that it hurts. I wouldn't imagine any of it.
After our second failed IVF treatment, I knew I was done with the shots and I was done holding on to this dream of being pregnant. The roller coaster of infertility treatments was over and I couldn't wait to get off the ride. I no longer wanted to fight with my body and I didn't want to cry anymore. I knew then that I was more than ready to be a mother and that it didn't matter if the child was born to me or not. That is when we got serious about adoption and growing our family.
I remember many discussions with Dave about whether we should adopt internationally or domestically. I remember talking about which country we would adopt from if we chose the international route. I remember looking at all sorts of beautiful children from all over the world. I remember not thinking about the child's history or about the child at all except that he/she needed a loving home. It was all about me and what felt comfortable for us. Sounds awful but that is the reality. We were naive.
Dave had brought up Ethiopia several times. Never did I dismiss it but I wasn't sold right away. I guess I was unsure if we would be able to care for an African American child and give this child the tools he/she needs to survive in this world. We were fortunate to know a couple who had recently adopted two handsome young boys from Ethiopia. This couple sat with us and answered all of our questions. They helped me realize that my child was in Ethiopia and I could raise an African American child. Ethiopia it was and we immediately began the adoption process.
Along came Maya. Two years later, Makenna.
Three years later we are parents to two incredible little girls who were both born in Ethiopia. In three years we have fallen in love with another country, the people, and the culture. Three years later we are no longer naive but informed. We now know that every adoption has a story, every child has his/her story. I grieve almost daily for the loss both of my girls endured. They not only loss their birth parents but their country as well. It is hard for all of us. At the same time we know the opportunities that are now available to our girls including education, but what we want most for our girls is to know Ethiopia, the people, history and the culture. We want them to know their birth story - to know the sacrifices that were made in order for them to be part of our family. Many people tell us how lucky the girls are, but we (Dave and myself) are the lucky ones. We get to parent these two beautiful Ethiopian beauties.
Adoption is hard and we would do it all over again although this time with our eyes wide open.
We love you Maya. We love you Makenna. We love your birth families, we love your birth country, and we love you.
Saturday, April 17
Fun Week at School
Maya's and Makenna's daycare celebrated the "Week of the Young Child". Each day had a theme. Of course we had to participate and Maya loved it. I would like to think Makenna had fun too.
Monday was? 
Crazy hair and clothes day! Maya didn't wear crazy clothes as her class got to go on a field trip to visit the animals at our local university.
Tuesday was? 
Sports day! Of course both girls wore their favorite college team's shirt.
Wednesday was? 
Beach day! They were to wear they favorite summer outfit.
Thursday was? 
Hat day! Love this picture - finally a great one of the two of them.
And Friday was? 
Pajama day! Makenna did not participate as her dayroom is very warm and all her pj's have long sleeves. Maya loved this day the best as she always wants to wear her pj's to school.
What a fun week!
Friday, April 16
Kids Chores
As a working mother of two adoptive girls, topics arise in my head about various things such as parenting, arts & crafts, kids related topics, etc. Therefore I have decided to start a discussion on my blog twice a month on a specific topic. I'd love for anyone reading my blog to provide their insight to the topic to help all of us learn more. If there is a certain topic anyone is interested in, please let me know. I can always been reached at ethiopiatofargo@gmail.com.
This week's Topic:
Question: How do you engage your young child in chores and how do you motivate them?
If your life is anything like mine than you are crazy busy. Many days it is a struggle to get the important things done such as loving on my girls that tasks such as tidying and cleaning the house seems impossible. In an ideal world, I would have a house cleaner come twice a month but in my reality, that house cleaner is me. Ultimately at the end of each week I find that all of the work got done, or if it didn't there will be tomorrow so I try not to let it stress me out too much.
I feel it is time to engage Maya in a few house chores such as picking up her toys at night, taking her dishes to the sink, and putting her shoes away. A few chores which are appropriate for her age and will help me and teach her how to care for the house and belongings.
I have been thinking about this for awhile now but not exactly sure how to begin this and how to motivate Maya. She is a strong willed little girl so I must come up with a stellar idea that will keep her engaged and minimize any power struggles. I love the idea of a chore chart but do they work and are they easy to maintain? Whatever I do, I'd like it to be simple, easy to maintain, and effective.
How early is it to start engaging your little one in house chores? What kind of chores is appropriate for a 3 year old? What tools and motivational techniques have you used and how effective were they?
What do you think?
Wednesday, April 14
More Baptism
Wow what a busy week! I am very thankful tomorrow is Thursday. My house is in disarray, I haven't seen much of my girls, and I'm exhausted. Sorry for the lack of posts and quality of posts but not much I can do when I'm not home. However, I wanted to post a few more pictures from Makenna's baptism. A big thank you to my sister Tori for taking and sharing the photos with me in such a timely manner. I really appreciate it!
I promise to return to blogging very soon. Please bear with me!
Here is Makenna getting water on her head - I wish I could have taken a picture of her face. She wasn't happy and let out a "silent" scream. 
The family with one of our amazing pastors, Pastor Kris. 
Makenna with all the Grandmas - so wonderful they were all able to attend. 
Us and Makenna along with her Godparents Cherrie and Kelly (Dave's sister). We really appreciate them taking on this very important role in Makenna's life. 
My best friend and sister Tori - love her! 
My awesome friend Kai who came to witness the baptism - so thankful for her. 
My nephews Benjamin and Jack with wild Maya and her adorable smile. 
What a wonderful day last Sunday. I am so thankful for our families for traveling to witness Makenna's baptism and to celebrate the day with us. We are incredible lucky to be surrounded with so much love.
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